November 2008

Let it OUT!

When you were growing up were you taught to hold your feelings in? Was wearing your emotions on your shirtsleeve frowned upon?

Did you establish this way of being yourself? Do you think expressing your emotions means that you are rocking the boat, or appear weak and foolish to those around you?

Releasing your emotions is critical to your health and wellbeing. If you are sad go ahead and cry. If you are frustrated or angry, put on your running shoes and go for a run. If you are fearful, try journaling or pick up the phone and talk about it with a friend.

Think about the times you have allowed yourself to feel these things, I am sure you have always felt better afterwards.

I find crying to be one of the best emotional releases, if that is how an emotion is surfacing. A study conducted in 1986 showed that crying was considered an important means of releasing physiological tensions. If they weren’t released, they would find another outlet, such as affecting one’s body and possibly causing disease. Another study in 1981 suggested that the complex protein in emotional tears (versus basal or reflex tears) is part of a human stress response. It was proposed that tears perform a physical catharsis by expelling toxins from your body.

In life people often try to steer others away from crying – actually doing things to keep them from crying. Interestingly enough, in therapy a psychologist often steers people into crying to discover their emotional center and issues that need to be tackled.

If you have stumbled upon a moment that brings tears to your eyes, it’s a clear message that you are holding onto something that needs to be healed and released.

In retreat that I held with a colleague, we conducted a talking stick ceremony. The talking stick, which was adorned with fur, beads and rawhide, was passed from person to person as we sat in a circle. The rules were simple: When you hold the stick you can only speak the truth. And, you cannot determine what you are going to say until you have the stick in your hand. It was an interesting and profound experience. Many were surprised about what they said when the stick was in their hands.

We all decided to do another round, and something different happened. As each person was holding the talking stick, an emotion bubbled near the surface. Many had tears in their eyes or actually cried. Since we had established a safe environment, it was freeing for everyone to express and release whatever they had been holding within.

This experience also demonstrated a wonderful thing. At the close of the retreat, everyone said they identified with what others were saying and experiencing. The consistent revelation was each person felt that they were not alone.

Allow yourself the freedom to shed those tears and release the emotions that are locked inside you. It is the healthy choice, and you will feel better, too!

Ms McCall’s practice includes the transformation and release of negative emotions held in one’s body. Contact Alice by email: alice@healingpath.info.

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